Compel - Week 5
February 1, 2009
Defining Moment
Genesis 25:24-28 & 32:24-31

I remember a few years ago I sat in an upscale business office that overlooked downtown. One entire wall was a window, providing a panoramic view of skyline. This was my friend's large law office started by his father many years ago and had now grown to be recognized all over the state. The office is a mixture of personal photos and eclectic artwork – paintings of Mother Teresa, Pictures of Jesus. My friend now loves Jesus, law is his profession – his passion is knowing Jesus. It hasn’t always been that way – younger lawyer, struggling with meaning of life. Went into a small store front church, he met Jesus. Defining moment. His wife knew that he was different when he walked in the door. Passion for Jesus led his to multiple trips in the Holy Land, sharing Christ in prisons, care for the poor and needy, boldly talking about Jesus among the most influential people.

Look at great people of the Bible, you find they have a defining moment that changed them dramatically. Paul – highway to Damascus, Peter on shoreline by the sea of Galilee, Jonah in the belly of whale, Matthew at the tax collecting booth, Samuel sleeping in the temple, Moses at a burning bush.

It’s a moment when God encounters you and leaves you different. Changed. During a difficult time in my life, a wise man told me, "Before God can use a man mightily, he must first break him." God loves us. God loves us too much to leave us to ourselves. And so there are moments when God brings us to a place where we experience him, we encounter him in such a profound way that it changes everything! In order for you to know God, in order for you to experience the satisfaction that only comes from God. In order for you to realize your unique significance on this planet – you must have a defining moment.

WARRING BROTHERS

What does that look like? I want to show you what that looks like through the life of a man named Jacob. Turn Gen 25.23-28

Story begins Gen 25 – Isaac and Rebekah, married - she was unable to have children, Isaac prayed to God she became pregnant – not with one, but with two. Early in the pregnancy, babies were moved about, why? Read Gen 25.24-28

These two boys couldn’t have been more different. Esau was the hairy, Jacob probably couldn’t grow hair. If they were TV shows, Esau would have been "Man vs. Wild" and Jacob would have been "What not to wear". Esau was the outdoors guy; Jacob was the stay inside guy. If Esau was the brawn, Jacob was the brain. Different as day and night! You can see the set up here, sibling rivalry, in the womb these brothers were duke-ing it out and in the world they were going to continue to fight (history has proven out the word God told her – the nations of Israel and the surrounding nations have been at war ever since, it all started in Rebekah’s womb.

Their names are significant – Esau means "hairy" – external features, Jacob means "heel grabber"- internal character – deceiver, manipulator, supplanter, to take the place of another through intrigue or underhanded tactics. And we will see how this name really fit Jacob.

Don’t run past the last verse. "Isaac, who had a taste for wild game, loved Esau, but Rebekah loved Jacob." Genesis 25.28 Isaac, Jacob’s father loved wild game, he loved the outdoors, he loved everything that Esau represented. He loved his looks, his smell, his strength, his abilities. Esau was his first born. And while we read the Jacob was loved by his mother – it’s what we don’t see that is the greatest pain in Jacobs’s life. Jacob lived with the clear understanding that his father did not love him….at least not as much as his older brother.

THE FATHER WOUND

The desire to be loved by your father is one of the strongest desires embedded in us as human beings. And when that love is withheld, it leaves a deep and profound wound. Robert Lewis in his study "Men’s Fraternity" talks about the "Father wound" – that is the wound left inside every man who has not experienced the approval, blessing and love of his father. That wound can be caused because dad was absent. He left the home, abandoned the family. Or maybe dad was there was he was a shadow, disconnected from his children. Even worse is the abusive father that not only withheld his blessing but instead abused, hurt, or wounded his sons and daughters.

This father wound is growing in epidemic proportions today. In 1960 17.5% of children lived apart from their biological fathers, by 1990 that had jumped to 38%. Today, 50% of children will spend part of their childhood without their dads.

"The social damage done by fatherlessness has seriously frayed our social fabric. Attempting to undo the social damage is proving a costly and unyielding task. And although the rise of contemporary fatherlessness is associated with the revolution of self-fulfillment and its promise of greater adult happiness, no one, least of all men, seems to be any happier as a result." David Popenoe, "Life without Father"

Jacob had a deep father wound. He longed for the approval, the love, the admiration, the blessing of his father. He saw how he father looked at Esau, how he favored him, how he was proud of him. And everything in him wanted to be blessed. And that wound set in motion a series of events that caused Jacob’s life to slowly unravel. Jacob started to try to get that blessing, that approval through other means. It became his driving force.

ALTERNATIVES TO THE BLESSING

He tried to get it through deception.

One day he brother Esau had been out in the field for days, hungry – "transfer your birthright to me" – the birthright – bekorah – means the exclusive rights given to the first born of the family. It usually included a double portion of the father’s inheritance. Jacob wanted it, Esau didn’t care about it, and so Jacob got the birthright by manipulation.

On another occasion, Isaac the father is about to die and he is ready to transfer his blessing to Esau his first born. This blessing was transference of God’s favor on the first born. While Esau was out hunting supper, Jacob disguised himself as his brother, putting goat skin on his skin, lowering his voice. "Is that you Esau?" "Yes, father" On that day, Isaac blessed Jacob. And when Esau came into Isaac’s tent ready to receive his blessing – there was no blessing to give! The Bible says, on that day, Esau wept and cried out loud, "Bless me too!" Ethics weren’t important to Jacob, only the blessing. But even though he received it, it really didn’t satisfy him.

He tried to get it through relationship.

Jacob travels to his uncle Laban’s home to escape the wrath of Esau. And he fell in love with a girl named Rachel, Laban’s daughter. Laban demanded that Jacob work for seven years to have her as his wife! (I like that idea) "So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her." Jacob 29.20 But when it came time for Jacob to take Rachel to be his wife, Laban pulled a fast one on Jacob

He tried to get it through financial success.

Jacob was about to meet with God. This is his defining moment. This is a great passage for starting the new year! Glimpse of what God wants from us this year.

Jacob had looked his entire life for a blessing
Tried to get it by deceiving father
Tried to get it through Laban
Ultimately God shows up

Man touched his hip – enormous power
Man in shadows – no one can see the face of God

This may cause me my life, but I won’t let you go until you bless me
All of us are looking for blessing in the wrong places

Human blessing will never last more than 5 minutes

Wrestling, "pinned down by God" – Then "he blessed him there" – what did he say?

When you meet God like that, you walk with a limp.

Jacob (heel grabber)-always been a deceiver, conniving man with few moral scruples.

• Took his brother’s birthright – bowl of soup
• When Jacob left home things were not good – deceived his father, alienated his mother, robed his brother – Esau’s plans to kill Jacob (27.41).
• 20 years he served Laban: Leah, Rachel – God had prospered him, threat to Laban’s heirs.
• God tells Jacob to go home (31.13) – encounter with Laban, made covenant, left in peace

JACOB HEADED HOME (32.1-21)

Esau was on Jacob’s mind

• V1-2 God met with Jacob, assurance of his presence – angles appeared, "two camps" – later divides into two camps.
• V3-7 Sends messengers, Esau is coming with 400 men! Panic
• V9-12 – Jacobs’s prayer: desperation, notice: 1) sees God’s blessing-unworthy, 2) acting on faith –going in the face of his fear, 3) Calling on God’s help. THIS IS A DIFFERENT MAN – terrified!
• V13-23- Jacob sends gifts ahead, sends wives and children on the other side of river!
• KEY VERSE
24 – "So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak." Have you ever been there – wrestled with God? I have found in those critical moments – God will get you alone and do business with you! Jacob wrestled with God – not like WWF, not like play wrestling (with my girls on the floor). This is hand to hand combat, brawl. Is that hard to see God like that? God was saying, "I’m going to go down there and teach this man a lesson!" God is taking Jacob out to the "wood shed". God’s discipline!

NOTICE: It’s night time – this was the darkest moment of Jacob’s life. For first time, he couldn’t worm his way out, deceive, trick. He was powerless. Alone. Empty. Scared. He had done all he could and there was nothing left. God was brining Jacob to the end of his rope. God will allow us to get there too. To the breaking point – so he can break through.

Jacob wrestles – fights – all the rage, fear, anger, frustration, rebellion – all of it comes out. Fighting with God, angry with God, afraid for his life.

(v25) Jacob would not quit. Wrestling with my dad – I wouldn’t quit, someone was going to get hurt. Jacob kept coming back, kept fighting back. [He didn’t just touch his hip – grabbed ankles and said, "Make a wish!"] dislocated his hip. God says, "Let me go! Give in" – Jacob, holding on to his leg, tears streaming down his face! At some point he realized this was no ordinary man – this was His only hope! Total desperation – nothing left. "I will not let you go until you bless me!" This was the moment – All his life he had been self-reliant. Not anymore! He was broken. For first time, he was dependant on God alone! [That is what God wants for you – total reliance, total dependence. Not on your own efforts, on him. Without that- you will never accomplish what he is calling you to do!] Paul – "In my weakness I am strong"!

Question: "What is your name?" Didn’t he know? "Jacob!" Say it louder! "Jacob!" Heel grabber, deceiver, stealer – that is your name, that is who you are. [Face to face with his sin, darkness of his own heart] Before God can change us, we have to admit who we really are – admit our rebellion, our self-reliance, our waywardness. [Tax collector that beat his chest and cried out for mercy – he received grace]

GRACE breaks through – v28 "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel – "he struggles with God". That is who you were – not anymore. Grace does a radical and invasive transformation! He takes away our sin, we die to our own man – we become a new person in Christ! Israel – you struggled with God and have overcome. Jacob the deceiver is gone – Israel the patriarch emerges, father of a great nation. (v30) Peniel- he saw God face to face. When was the last time you have wrestled with God, met him face to face? Let him evaluate your life – looked in the mirror and taken an honest look?

V31 – "The sun rose above him as he passed Peniel, and he was limping because of his hip." Sun rising – new day. Circumstance hadn’t changed –Esau still coming, but it wasn’t night anymore in Jacob. He was a different man. God was with him. It’s a new year! Isn’t it time to get alone – face to face with God?